Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Awake from a Dream

Just realised that this post have been left unposted for quite sometime.

I just woke up from the weirdest dream. It was stunningly vivid, and it reflected my real life so appositely.

I was living in some sort of boarding school, but we had entire apartments to ourselves. 6 people to an apartment. It was quite big, but as I remember it, it was also rather dark and musty, with old equipment stacked everywhere, sort of like in a storeroom. The six people living in the apartment were my Dad (who did not appear throughout most of the time other than the time he annoyed me by acting all weird and calling back right in front of me when he saw a missed called from me right in front of my face. It turned out that he called the wrong number in the end and the person on the other end of the line probably received his ridiculous voice.) There was also TRF and some other boarding stuff. And the other two were her, some other female, and me.

One night, she was being quite kind and friendly to me. We were talking just outside the door about life. She was all sweet and giggling all the while. Somehow, we managed to start discussing about furniture arrangement within our apartment And then, she said: "Oh Oh! I know! Maybe next time, at this spot, you can put all your naked wives here!" She also said another statement that, combined with the previous one, would imply that she would be together with me, but I forgot what it was, and it, stand alone, didn't mean much unfortunately. (I forgot what that statement was) And what I strongly felt like replying at that time was: Hey you've to be careful of your words, because I'm sure you do not want to be naked standing there in a few years time.

The scene changes. The boarding mentor approached me with a really anxious face and said to me: what is going on? I slowly found out that I was in some kind of trouble at moelc. It seems that she has been using the computer at the bookshop with her internet account when she was supposed to be printing her assignment, and really failed and doing a google search of a few of a friends names, thus resulting in a plethora of search requests, jamming the server. And because of that she was also in doubt of having misused another's account when she should have been using her own ( I don't know the relationship). And since I have slight affiliations with her, I was accused of being her accomplice.

No wonder I recalled having seen a teacher at MOELC filling up some form with her name on on the computer as I walked past the staff room. Must have been a document of offense.

Then I checked my phone, there were quite a few smses from her saying about that, and that she was sorry she caused me to get into trouble as well. She sounded really sad. And I wanted to call her down to talk, and tell her that its okay. We get into trouble TOGETHER. A good chance to comfort her and get into her better books. I wanted to call her down to talk ( I think she was upstairs. The apartment was normal sized, but it had 12 stories just like the hostel. I never saw the other floors in the dream. ) but it was about to be dinner soon. But I had a sudden realisation at that time, I started being paranoid once again about perhaps because she feels that she owes me, that she started being so nice. I was really dreading that, I wanted her genuine feelings.

And then I had a really bad cold, such that I had difficulty breathing. Hurberg called to ask me about a math test, but i brushed him off, for I was getting short of breath.

First, the storeroom-like depiction was an accurate reflection of the conditions I went to sleep in, my messed up room with rubbish strewn all over the floor. Her treatment to me was probably a saccharine aftereffect of her actually asking me to teach her stuff for the first time the day before. However, my paranoia in my dream stems from a possible innate worry that she is only being nice to me when she needs my help, something which of course, I wouldn't want. And then I just had math test before I went to sleep, and believe it or not, I dreamt about before the math test.